i got off at four and went straight to matts house. i was soooo tired i pretty much just changed, and went to sleep. once he got home he woke me up and we went over to crystals! me and crystal carved our pumpkins and they pretty much look like shittt. haha. but it was funn. matt brought me breakfast this morningggg. and its been raining so hopefully they wont cancel the concert !! ahhh, id be so upset.
its kind of funny how nothing my mom says directly to me bothers me anymore. she obviously knew me and brien werent together anymore. its all over facebook. but she deffently didnt make it a point to call or anything. but last night she posted a video of me and him and then liked on of his status' i mean really? so i sent her a message saying that i had moved on but i would appreciate it if she didnt talk to brien or anything or else i would have to delete her. haaa, she got pissed. she was like im glad you moved on, and i hope your happy cause i guess thats all that matters anyways. but i think you might have rushed into it a little but. i RUSHED? seriously. you got pregnant... it does matter if im happy because i spent too much time trying to please everyone else. and then she went on about how she wasnt going to let my selfishness effect her and taylor anymore.. MY SELFISHNESS? how am i selfish? what the fuckkk have i ever asked her for? what have i ever asked ANYONE for? shes the selfish one.. buying the cars that she did.. two at a time. or going out all weekend and me having to stay at home with taylor before i could drive. those were my high school weekends. and then bringing random ass guys home.. thats not selfish? we were too young for that. ridiculous. you neverrrr put me first, ever. im not a mom but im pretty sure your child comes first, at least mine will anyways. and my dad alwayssss puts me first. its clear we cant have a normal relationship, and now we cant have a relationship at all. and the sad part is thats fine with me. because maybe it is be being selfish? but im tired of letting you bring me down. so this is it. you shouldnt try to call, write, whateverrr. it wont do any good. finally i stood up for myself. and maybe i am mad at all the mistakes shes mad, but i ALWAYS give people chances.. im not the kind of person to just write people off. its going to be a sad day when she doesnt see me get married, or doesnt see me on christmas. its going to be sad when taylor fucks up more than she already is, and then she realizes that i work as hard as i do. im so thankful for my dad, april, matt, and all my friendsss.
